Have you ever had one of those days where you woke up and just knew it was going to be a bad day?
That was me yesterday. I literally woke and could feel the resistance in the air. I tried to push past it and say it's going to be a good day but when I asked for guidance in my meditation my cards revealed that was a lie.... (I really just love saying that).
After every meditation, I pull an Oracle card for myself to receive any messages from my guides. Yesterday's messages, as 3 cards flew out of the deck was a theme I couldn't understand at the time, mainly because I was already all up in my own head. My guides were trying to tell me to let go. To stop trying to control the outcome of the situation I felt I was facing. That I would be faced with a fork in the road and need to make a CONSCIOUS decision and whatever I decide I must take responsibility for it and last to ride the wave.
My response was ...WHAT?!?!
Oh and I forgot to mention that I have a dream the night before about a family of Orangutans who had moved into my 3 million dollar apartment. (I would never buy a 3 million dollar apartment) it was vivid, so I knew there was another meaning I wasn't seeing. Upon further investigation, I would come to realize it was a sign that a rough time was ahead.
Well, they nailed that shit. Yesterday sucked!
I have really become quite good at going from in my head to the present moment and returning to faith quickly. So when I began to feel like I was locked in the prison of my own mind with no way out about 5 hours later in the day, I knew this was going to be a doozy. Literally like a jail with me banging on the bars having a tantrum.
I hadn't been this way in a long time and was seriously contemplating taking the easy way out. Just numbing it out to get through the night. To give in to my egoic mind who is saying just go get that bottle of wine and why you're at it grab a pizza and some candy. Let's throw an ego party and forget about it. This was my go to for years and years, I had this battle in my head for no joke, about 2 hours before I said, NOPE there has to be a better way. I will just wake up tomorrow more pissed at myself feeling like crap and oh my problem will still be there, So I am going to go ahead and face it head on now.
I asked myself what do you really want right now? Answer: Peace.
Where can you find peace right now? Answer: The Beach
I grabbed my son and headed to the beach by my house. We spent the next 45 minutes in my happy place, soaking up the salt water and watching the sunset. I instantly felt peace.
I returned home and began cleaning my house, it's my go to when I just need to be in the present moment. The present moment is the only place that is real, that is safe. I can't predict the future, can you? I could make a decision today that will change tomorrows outcome in a blink of an eye. I just needed to look at the facts. Everything has always worked out for me, even if it wasn't the way I planned for it. It was time to remember as I embark on new business adventures and tap into my spiritual gift's even more, my ego will roar louder and louder.
Our mind, ego, whatever you want to call it is there to protect us. It keep's us paying safe and small. It has its purpose, but this definitely wasn't it. F that, I want to push myself to amazing things, so I am choosing to live in my heart, to lean on God, Universal Energy, and Faith. I choose to surrender the BS and say, what is meant to be will be, so why fight with myself. What a waste of my energy.
So, in the end, I want you to know your ego is going to want to throw a lot of parties. It will try to imprison you in your own mind of limiting beliefs, BS fears and you need to know IT'S NOT REAL. Get present. Find your happy place. Surrender and ride the wave all the way to peace.
Special thanks to my spiritual bestie Kendra for always having my back and letting me spew my ego BS into the light. You are the best.
All my love,